Why Does My House Smell Even Though I Have No Pets And I Keep It Clean?

Books and paper may have a musty smell. Certain paperbacks turn yellow and deteriorate and I had to throw them out when I volunteered in a library or these books would risk contaminating others. Toss out all old newspapers, magazines and unneeded paper as paper holds other smells. For remaining must-keeps, invest in a proper airtight box, and throw in a sachet of lavender-oil scented handkerchief, rag, etc. Seal it tightly and label the outside with masking tape so you can write on it and change as often as needed. Good bye musty papers and clutter, hello fresh healthy smells.
There could be many reasons the home smells off. I would check under the kitchen sink for any black mold from water damage. Check your flooring up close, get on all fours and really test it especially around any possible contact with water leaks or high traffic areas, especially in the bathroom and near doors.
I entered an optician’s store with wall to wall carpeting and instantly I could smell the carpet had not been shampooed in decades. Uggh. Wash your carpets, it is worth the cost and ought to be repeated at least twice a year. Consider buying a decent carpet cleaner, especially if you have pets. Learn to use it correctly. If you have a male cat, even after being spayed there could be low-lying levels of testosterone. Take kitty in for a bloodtest. Make 100% sure Mr. Kitty is not spraying whatsoever at all. Be careful of old rugs from friends/thrift shops. Inspect them carefully with a blacklight for old urine, etc. Kitty, though neutered, could be feeling territorial and want to urinate over that spot, and even if kitty is neutered, and the urine is much milder, hey, urine is urine. You feel me.
Give all throws and blankets a good shake and run them through the wash or drycleaners along with all cushions. Avoid Febreze as you will keep on needing it again and again without solving the underlying problem. And expose your liver, kidney and lungs to toxic chemicals.
Try airing out your place every day, early in the morning or late at night, depending on your preferences for quiet, temperature. The main thing to do is air frequently. Air out after cooking. Air out after any type of candle or incense as they have a soot build up. Air out every time before, during and right after cooking. Consider changing what you cook. For example, I don’t fry bacon, beef, fish or liver at home. I eat these meals at a restaurant once in a blue moon.
Consider what smells bother you the most. I love onions and garlic but I can’t stand if the cat litterbox is not changed daily. Every time I go to the washroom I pass by the catbox and I can tell right away by the tracks in the corn mulch if there is a recent deposit. (I swear by corn litter. Avoid Arm n Hammer overperfumed corn litter though as it stinks like a cheap gas station air freshener. The corn really works wonders all by itself, but buy a small bag from a reputable store, make sure it is not old, damp or mouldy. Good luck) I clear it right away, and I put both 1 & 2 in a sealed Ziploc bag, 30 by 30 cm and seal it (no smells, no daily trips to the garbage chute!) then wash my hands thoroughly. I keep a pair of specially coloured gloves near the cat litter box in case my hands are dry. I wash the gloves right away as thoroughly as if they were my hands.
Do you have hobbies like knitting? Maybe large bags of old wool are capturing stale smells. Try airing them out, even gently washing them or drycleaning. Try to buy only what you need and not overstock on anything. Same goes for baseball gloves, hockey equipment. I used to play hockey and gear gets very smelly, very fast.
Some people don’t keep on top of their laundry. I do not want to generalize, but I have often noticed that some people overload the washer, not allowing sufficient water to come between and properly wash and rinse. Some people’s clothes smells perpetually sweaty and funky. Toss these clothes, do not donate them and start fresh, vowing to buy easy to clean clothes that do not look stained right away (forget white shirts. They flatter very few people) Watch Youtube videos with as much seriousness as learning to do math or build a house. Your clothes will last longer, smell fresher and you will attract new friends, love and influence people. Forget fashion. Just be clean. Forget fabric softener, laundry perfumed products and soaps, dryer sheets, etc. Just a waste of money. Baking soda, Borax and vinegar are the only natural laundry boosters I use. Try to buy clothes that doesn’t need ironing. You don’t have time for that and the heat tends to keep smells locked in clothes.
Wash everything. Even things you think don’t need washing, like pillboxes, telephones, door handles and walls. Walls retain smells, oh yes they do. Wash all the window frames, wash underneath the frames, wash all baseboards, the top edge. Wash on top of doorframes. Wash old pencils, binders, donate them to schools or charities. Consider showcasing collectibles differently after washing them. When in doubt, wash or toss.
A lot of people ask me why do we have to clean? It is to protect our immune system from bacterial overload. I used to work as a janitor in various health clinics. We don’t want our homes looking and smelling like a barn. I love animals dearly, but they have a vastly different tolerance for microorganisms than we.
Buy a new mattress and cover both boxsprings and matress with heavy-duty quality dustproof and bedbug encasement covers. Wash all pillows, get pillow encasement protectors and consider replacing pillows every year or two. Take no risks these days. Consider using a couch cover and that all new furniture must be light, durable and easy to clean.
And for the kitchen and fridge, invest in great shelves for the pantry. Put masking tape on everything once opened to state the date it was opened. Toss anything weird, even if not expired. It may still be safe to eat, but it may be smelling up your home. Close up everything tightly, both for its longer shelflife and your clean-smelling home.
Keep shoes fresh. Air them on the balcony or outdoors in dry weather. I use baking soda. Silver-lined sox and wicking sox cut down on smelly feet.
And to conclude, try drinking at least 2–3L of distilled water with added mineral drops. This may help decrease body odour from diet or health challenges.

Can My Home Be Too Clean?

There are a variety of ways I would feel, and then there are a variety of ways I would politely respond if someone said my home was too clean. First, I would be dang glad that my home would be too clean. But I would refrain from gloating about it around such a person who would make such a backhanded compliment-comment. If they are clearly laughing, joking and teasing I would tease back, ‘Ah, it’s such a problem, eh?’ If they say it once, I would respond with, ‘Ah, well, you know…’ while I smile softly. The answer in and of itself, trailing off like that, unfinished suggests that I don’t have anything to defend, to add, it is not worth responding to, or I am not in the least bit upset that my home is too clean, nor am I upset with the person saying it, as it is their (silly) opinion(that they should have kept to themselves) oh, I see, they are saying it to make me feel bad? About having a clean home? Best not to point out their insecurities.
Lol, I had some random stranger compliment me for spending 30 minutes cleaning up my closest park for once in 4 years, and yet 10 minutes later another random stranger tried to stop me from cleaning it. I like to laugh and I plan to do so more often. Cleaning, writing, laughing: survey says, they are good for health. Complaining and attempting to make others feel small: not healthy. It’s worth tipping the balance. Enjoy your too-clean home, wink.
PS (Now, about the rare individuals who may have an obsessive- compulsive disorder to clean non-stop or at inappropriate times: ask yourself if your cleaning is preventing you from socializing, relaxing, entertaining, being friendly, etc. You know the answer hopefully :)

How Do You Trust Someone Who Has Cheated on You?

I write this in response to a question asked online. The answer to me, is not so much how can you, but simply, do you want to? I don’t mean in any way to minimize the seriousness or any of the hurt here, but in order to reduce being hurt and protect oneself, I would take steps towards writing down what it is about the other person I value so much, and how can I start creating that value within myself? 
Many years ago I was in a disastrous relationship with someone who I discovered had betrayed me as well as a third party. Yet I found it almost impossible to let go of this person and move on. He was so very different than me, and I failed to see how anyone else or how I could provide to myself what I perceived he added to my life. Yet I did discover how, by really reflecting and meditating on this. I would rather help you think critically than tell you just anything or give a pat answer. (Thinking critically here does not mean criticism, but a sense of deep analysis) 

The reason I write this is because I know just how much pain and hurt there can be here, and you deserve so very much more than that. I healed when I shifted the attention away from waiting for and evaluating someone else, to investing all that energy on building me up inside and developing trust with myself. That profile pic you see of me is the morning after I had met a very genuine, kind, trustworthy, handsome, caring man. How did I know when I met the real thing? Because I had become the real thing. I married him 5 months after and we have been together, without bs for over 4 years. It’s not about him, it’s about you. Enjoy your life.

Bonjour tout le monde! Bienvenue à mon blogue bilingue!

Bonjour tout le monde et bonjour spécialement à celles et ceux qui m'ont motivé d'écrire en français. Pour  vous qui savez depuis longtemps, vous ne seriez pas confus de me voir lire, étudier et vivre une partie de mon quotidien tous les jours en français. Mais savez vous  pourquoi je le fais?

Depuis mon enfance j'ai toujours rêvé de retourner vivre au Québec près de mes grand-parents. À cause de quelques difficultés de santé j'ai été  obligé de vivre en Ontario. Je me suis décidé de lâcher mes études en français à Montréal. C'était une  des pires décisions que j'ai jamais entrepris, et je passerais une grande partie de ma vie en le regrettant.

Pour moi, j'ai tout lâché pour aller vivre à Montréal et maîtriser le français. J'ose dire maîtriser, même  si ça ne se paraît pas avec quelques petits erreurs.

Je veux avancer dans le français! Encore plus loin! Je  ne veux plus d'accent, je veux faire mes r parfaitement.

Je me suis fixe un but: Un année je  vais écrire pour NaNoWriMo en français! 100,000 mots dans un seul mois, novembre, sans avoir besoin de trouver des mots dans le dictionnaire ou vérifier avec le Bescherelle.

Et pour commencer, je vais écrire un minimum de 100 mots par jour! Ici sur mon blogue. J'ai aucune envie d'écrire en anglais. On dirait un blocage, mais c'est plus  fort que ça. Je trouve que tout était déjà écrit, tout était bien exprimé, en détail et quoi ai-je  à contribué? Je m'en fou maintenant d'écrire et je veux me focaliser sur le français et l'apprentissage  totale! Jusqu'au boutte! Et je veux boucler cette affaire de l'écriture française! J'ai mon diplôme secondaire depuis  longtemps, croyez-moi là-dessus, mais si je dois retourner aux études et ce fois-ci m'enregistrer pour un  cours de français comme langue maternelle, 9ième année, je vais l'essayer. (332 mots :) )

Si vous avez des corrigements, veuillez-les laisser dans vos commentaires gentilles. Merci à tous pour votre temps.

How To Meet Your Future Spouse On-Line

Yes, you CAN meet the love of your life, even your wife (or hubby) online. I met my husband on plenty of fish. I had tried unsuccessfully two other times, but I learned from my errors and got closer to knowing. 

 #1 Your photo needs to be very recent, very accurate, detailed and very captivating. Your current hair colour, hairstyle. Your photo is your other's first impression of you. Come on, this is the selfie generation, people. Be sure to take photos outdoors as natural light is the most flattering. Never wear sunglasses or caps. Take at least 8 photos, realistic, if you wear glasses make some with but also make some without. Make some in your party outfit, work clothes. Show the fullness of your life. 

#2 Write a very detailed PRECISE bio of who you are, get it proofread and ask your closest friends if it is a full, accurate and precise description of your true personality. 

#3 Describe how you live right now, describe your deal-breakers and deal-makers. DO NOT talk about clichés like enjoying movies, sunsets or chocolates. The more you focus on your specific, unique strengths without exaggerating them, you will succeed. 

For example I specified in my ad I am a writer seeking no children, cats were crucial, I want to study writing and religion, I can't stand tobacco, not a morning person, church is vital and I want to travel and do charity work. I am crazy about classical music. In 2 hours I found my husband. Yes. Because I honed in on exactly what I wanted. We talked on the phone that night, we met the following day. We were engaged in 5 months and are now happily married 4 years and going strong.

#4 To the ladies: Ignore all replies that are only one word, like hi, ignore most replies (bite the bullet, there are lots of perverts out there, just expect them but dodge them and block), screen for complete sentences that are friendly, respectful and lively, either having humour or respectful playfulness. If the guy interests you after chatting for a week or two, MEET in a public place at least 2-5 times only. Do NOT chat online endlessly, it's a complete waste of time. Your goal is a DATE, not an online pal. Do NOT say, Let's be friends, because friends don't date, and you DO want more than friendship in the near future if things work out, right? So seek courtship, not platonic friendship. Friendship is 99% of marriage, but you want some romance too, right? If you are up for it, conduct your own Advanced Search on pof, where you set the parameters for if you only want to meet marriage-minded men, etc.

 #5 To the gentlemen: Take more pics, we are visual, too. Please, don't upload only one photo with sunglasses and/or a cap. It looks like you have something to hide. Describe more about yourself 

To those of you on plenty of fish, which is where I met my husband, I can't emphasize this enough...if you NEVER, EVER want to get married then under Relationship Goal on plenty of fish put Long-term. If you NEVER want to do anything other than date select Dating. Please, do not make the mistake of putting Dating because you are not interested in marriage in the next 6 months. If you want to get married should the right gal come along, you will not find a wife listing long-term or dating. Trust me on this. Best Success.

The Professor in Germany Doesn't Accept Male East Indian Interns?

India, the great land of Gandhi, the Bhagavad Gita, the birthplace of many spiritual leaders has been unfairly tainted by a female professor in Germany. The professor made an illogical sweeping generalization  that India has a disproportionately high number of men who rape, so therefore any man from India is dangerous and should not be allowed to work with her students.

I can't believe that ALL MEN in India are regarded so suspiciously. The vast majority of Indian and other South Asian men should not be blamed for the random chaotic acts of a few disturbed individuals. I am appalled how many of my Canadian women friends would never date an Indian man. Let me establish something here.

India is a country of very high moral standards. Yes, there is some political corruption. This happens in most countries, to a greater or lesser extent. What I am talking about is that India has a much stronger sense of family and a very high respect for mothers and women. Look at their female heads of state. Indians still marry much younger than their Western counterparts. And rape is very high in Canada. Perhaps the professor in Germany should decline to work with Canadian and American males. After all, 1 out of 4 North American women having undergone sexual assault...

The public outcry and mass demonstrations in India were not because rape happens to 25% of women, 1 out of 4. That is how many women in CANADA are sexually assaulted, yet you see no Canadian outcry. The percentage of women  sexually assaulted in India is much lower. Much, much lower. India was outraged because they DO NOT tolerate rape whatsoever. Many Indians are demanding castration and the death penalty. I find this an extreme punishment, yet I understand why Indians are so angry. I am angry that this professor is creating hysteria and shutting out a whole country just because its country spoke out so vividly against rape. What irony.

So, what is really behind this erroneous fear of Indian men? Most Indian men I know go beyond the call of duty in being highly respectful, ethical, ultra kind and helpful. These illusory fears strike me as being racist.

I have heard for years of this racism towards South Asian men. The fears range from."They smell different..." to "They must all beat their women,.." to "They expect to be served like a king."

No one man in India is like any other. Some men might be more traditional,  but still, Indian culture places such high value on women unlike North America and Europe. In Hinduism the Hindu priest has more authority than the father, but the mother has more authority than the priest! 

I take it seriously when any person of any ethnicity is raped or mistreated in any way. In no way am I making any allowances for any mistreatment, especially rape. But all of India can not be scapegoated because of unusual recent trends. Rape is more prevalent in the North part of India, especially Delhi, the capitol of India which attracts a huge number of people seeking government work. A large number of these are single men seeking good jobs precisely to set themselves up to become husbands. As we all know, India has a very fast growing, staggeringly huge population. But do people realize that there are over a million males in Delhi extra than females, one of the highest imbalances in the male to female ratio anywhere in the world?

Western influences are on the rise, destabilizing cultural traditions and norms. None of this justifies any woman being hurt... And, yes, women are reluctant to come forward to the police, but they are also reluctant in Canada and other more developed nations. So, do you really think the rape is affecting 25% of Indian women? It is happening in India to a far lower percentage of women, but because of the astronomical population and the rapidly increasing media attention and public outcry, the numbers seem so large.

In India, rapes happen more between strangers, whereas rape in North America is between acquaintances, known as date rape. It seems rape between strangers bothers people much more, yet rape is rape. It would sadden you to know that Canada didn't criminalize a husband raping his wife until 1984, and Germany didn't criminalize marital rape until 1997, and Iceland, reputed to be such a feminist country, did not criminalize marital rape until 2007!!!

Let me make this more clear, I am very happy I married an Indian man. I am blown away by his calm demeanor, his serenity, his meditative nature, his very constant kindnesses towards our cat, family, friends and everyone we meet. I would never hesitate to recommend an Indian man as a suitable husband and father to all my peers. It's high time the record be set straight. Indian men deserve our highest regards. Love is stronger. People are tired of myths and generalizations. Racism solves no problems. Rape has no ethnicity.

People Are Worth Forgiving

People tell me often, "Oh I could never forgive this person or group of people for..."
But I find as I ask more probing questions, it seems these same people do not feel it is right to forgive.  People in the most pain seldom realize that forgiveness would relieve their agony. But still these people reserve forgiveness for many years down the road, often waiting until they "get it together" or until they have a spiritual awakening. To me, I find that forgiveness leads to spiritual awakening.

 But forgiveness in this very moment is much more powerful than magically waiting for "those people" to be worthy of forgiveness. Perhaps it is we who need to forgive, who need to decide that we are worthy to forgive them for wronging us. 

So I write this post from a different perspective. This is not a simple play on words. If the person  who was wronged immediately thought the perpetrators were worthy of forgiveness from day one,  no one would need help in forgiving. Forgiving is an entirely ironic thing. I am telling you that no one need be worthy of forgiveness, yet I am telling you with this post's title that people are worthy of forgiving. The wrong-doer needs the forgiveness like soil needs rain so that new growth can better take place. The wrong-doer can most evolve when accepting the forgiveness as confirmation of his/her humanity and potential for change. Think of forgiveness like a ritual that transforms both the giver and the receiver. For this reason forgiveness is sacred and not to be taken lightly. When we forgive, we set ourselves free and we set the other person free. People are worthy of this, right?

Forgiveness is a prelude to mercy. Mercy means giving people another chance. We would not need to forgive if there were no misdeeds. Of course you've been wronged. Why else would you be at a crossroads feeling compelled to forgive, yet torn in two thinking "they" are not deserving of forgiveness?  A person who has been wronged is angry, and an angry person does not feel like forgiving. But I invite you to see forgiveness differently. I invite you to see it like washing the dishes. And I mean it in the sense of washing your mind clean of all the bitterness, resentment and frustration.

Of course they did something wrong. Otherwise there would be no need to forgive.

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Stop! What are you doing with the microwave?

Floyd! Do NOT put that vintage style glass bowl in the microwave!  Stop. No..." I implored my step-father.

Unfortunately for me, the men do all the cooking in our family. And Floyd is a stodgy, stalwart truck driver from the wild forests of New Brunswick, Canada so I have to endure these rough baking selections.

Banana bread. And more banana bread. And only banana bread because that is the only thing Floyd bakes. Is it the only thing he knows how? Is it because he lives off of bananas? Is it because it's easy to make, and Floyd is a very hard-working man? I don't bake myself, fearing I'll eat everything in sight. Floyd's banana bread is an OK snack with milk. I particularly like the end crusts, which no one else touches. So I have a duty to finish off the crusts.

 I brought over a sample to my chef friend who studied and worked in France. "This is terrible," my friend said. "Don't ever offer me this again."
 Floyd is super vigilant about saving money on electricity so now he cooks almost everything in the microwave. I tried warning him:"That bowl is made before microwaves existed. Clearly it is not microwave-friendly. You may crack the bowl, even shatter it into shards. You may break your microwave over this." But burly Floyd, who is a cross between Kenny Rogers and Chuck Norris, is implacable. He won't budge. This is what happens when we let men cook. Very macho. No compromises. No cooperation. No additions. Oh well, at least we women just serve and do dishes.
*                                                                                    *                                                                 *

I go off on an absent-minded journey out the back door to the garden eating store-made brownies, the kind with too many multicolored sprinkles in a wrapper that could outlast an apartment lease, fortified with artificial this-n-that, so let's be grateful we have a man who cooks. And bakes. I go out admiring the gardens, playing with the excitable Pomeranian dog.

Time flew by. I had completely forgotten the crazy cooking mishap. I amble into the kitchen for a glass of ginger ale and there is Floydy-Doydy, wrinkling his forehead and shaking his head, looking sad and grinning happy at the same time. He stands arms across his chest out of defiance or self-comfort as his eyes gesture to me to look on the counter. On top of the too-large thick wooden cutting board is the famous blue bowl. He looks smug and mischievious. "Gotta let it cool first before we can slice it." he grunts in a cheerful way. I sense he is expecting me to slice it as slicing is closely related to serving so he is clearly off the hook. He's completed his task. He is now exiting the kitchen.

I go over to the bowl, speechless. I try gingerly touching the sides of the glass bowl. Boiling hot. Steam is rising fast and furious from the bread. I try touching the bread with a butter knife to stay safe. The bread is as hard as a rock. Floyd's creation looks like a friendly brown meteorite, faintly smelling of bananas.

For more tales of Floyd, stay tuned ....and don't put anything in the microwave I wouldn't put.

Ooops! Sorry. I forgot to tell you a key part of this story. Floyd not only used the worst cooking dish possible, he had put it in for a grand total of 45 minutes. "Look here, this here recipe says 45 minutes, so I'mma gonna cook it for 45 minutes." Stove yes, microwave a big fat NO! Microwaves cook like 10 times faster.  And to think that in his day to day job he does construction. Egad. The cake resembled a concrete sidewalk. We ended up throwing out the bowl with the uncuttable, unremovable cake. Oh Floyd.

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Blame Gets Disguised As Resentment

OK, OK, so some well-meaning people kept telling me over the years to make a list of any person, place or thing, institution or idea that I resent. Then they asked me to analyze what part I played to keep the resentment growing. This was suggested as a spiritual exercise over twenty years ago. I kept struggling with it because I couldn't see the usefulness of writing down a whole catalog of all my dislikes. But when I asked myself, "How many people do I BLAME and WHY do I blame them?" then I knew which people to really focus on forgiving or setting boundaries with. Working with the word <resentment> was too vague for me. Resentments could take hold over any slight annoyance. When I substituted the word BLAME, then I saw how the activity of blaming this or that person was keeping me stuck.

 Blame is such an obvious problem, and a more immediate forest fire to put out in one's mind. Try this simple suggestion for yourself. Why else are you making an inventory of yourself? It's to transcend your limitations, isn't it? You are not writing a whole personalized telephone book of every single person, place, thing and situation that irked you? You could waste a lot of time. What few key persons could you write the names of to fill up a tiny match book cover? That's who you blame. Work on setting yourself free starting right now. You see, they're the biggies who are really weighing you down. And when you set yourself free, lots of pressure will be lifted off you.

Last night as I was walking home to get back in shape and economize on bus fare, I came across a man trying to park a trailer hitched to the back of his vehicle. Rather, let me say I heard the crash before I saw the vehicle. There was no one else around. Being as I am a D.O.E., or Daughter of an Engineer, I called out to the man, "Need some help?"

Image result for images of a young woman in pigtails
(Not me, but close enough, ha ha)
 He seemed puzzled that a youngish looking lady with pigtails and feminine wide brimmed straw hat replete with polka dot bow and wearing a frilly turquoise summer top in diamond navy blue leggings would be mechanically inclined. As a young girl I often had to help my father back up trailers and vehicles and I am a math student. Always looking for something to measure or calculate...ha ha. I enjoy putting my math skills to good use. I also have truckers in my family so I know just how difficult it is to navigate some turns and park that 18 wheeled monster.

He still was peering out at me but he looked relatively harmless so I said cheerfully, "Sorry, but I heard the crash. Don't mean to embarrass you, sir, but would a second pair of eyes help?" His face lit up, so I walked over but his words still showed surprise and embarrassment that a woman would be helpful in his jam. We did succeed quite quickly in parking his trailer. And as he got out to unhitch his trailer he told me that the part that came next really injured his back a month ago. He explained that he would have to swing the whole trailer over to a post to chain it.

 Maybe he would think I was odd, well, maybe he already thought I was odd, so I took a risk and said, "I am an energy healer. I work with energy. So why don't we use a combination of martial arts and Reiki to leverage yourself so you can swing the trailer with ease? Remember how a mother can suddenly summon unheard of strength to lift a car off her child? You can summon this strength in you, using your stores of adrenaline, then plant your feet firmly in the ground, use your thigh and leg muscles, then lift."

And he amazingly lifted up the trailer with more ease and less pain. I helped move the stand so he could just focus on the weight. In a matter of less than 30 seconds we had moved over the trailer by several feet so it could be securely locked. He thanked me and I went on my way.

At first on my walk back home I thought of how sometimes all a person needs is a presence, a few words of support and encouragement. As a spiritual guide I felt honored to help in any small way. While walking I realized a deeper message. Perhaps the universe was trying to show me that I needed to let go of a lot of heavy baggage. I have been having ongoing back pains that I couldn't seem to resolve. I thought to myself, "What am I carrying around, physically and psychologically that I need to get clear of? What ideas do I need to "park" somewhere and LEAVE BEHIND for good?

 Then I realized that I still resented my superintendent for smoking in the apartment building. I was having a hard time getting the anti-smoking bylaw enforced. I am on a spiritual path. I can't afford to hate anyone. But that crazy trailer incident made me see that subconsciously I was carrying way too much load about a lot of other people's problems.  I could stop blaming the superintendent's carelessness or stubbornness for my suffering.

 My tekkie husband suggested I start a blog to share my insights. Now I have two blogs which are immensely therapeutic and cleansing. Even my writing style is changing, becoming lighter and freer! I owe him so much for helping me put my writing skills online and up to date.

Here I was, very well known in my city of over a million people environs, as an expert in how to do stepwork, and poised to write a book about letting go of resentments and how to forgive, yet as soon as I would clear some resentments off my list, new ones would come. A lot fewer, but still. What helped push me to finally let go of all this accumulated mental junk was visualizing myself leaving to India. Am I really gonna bring all this baggage?

You know how they say, if your home was on fire, what would you flee with? I saw with that man's oversized trailer how I was accidentally smashing into people, or allowing their wrong choices to smash into me. And now I could create some clearance. I could give them a wide berth (distance, not birth). I could mentally create space by detaching, by telling myself over and over again, mantra style, Live and Let Live.

You Are So Beautiful, Here's Why

Did anyone tell you that you were loved today? Recently? This year? Great. I'm glad to hear it. Now did anyone tell you that you are beautiful\handsome? You owe it to yourself to seek out people who appreciate you at your best. Beauty is art, whether it's your attractive way of putting words together in writing or speaking, or your pleasing way of dressing, serving food, how you maximize certain facial features or accentuate your hair. Beauty can be likened to a skill, and the good news is that anyone can capitalize on this.

Oh No, My Husband and Cat Are Fighting Over The Chair AGAIN

"GREEZOO!"  My husband says with mounting exasperation. "What are you doing cat? Why are you in my chair? Oh, I know. He's trying to dominate me. He wants to show he's the boss." 

I quietly added a third chair to the dining table. But Mr. Greezooks simply keeps divebombing for whichever chair my hubby sits in. If he sits in the white wooden chair, Greezooks makes a beeline for that one. If my man favours the unpainted wood chair, the cat beats him to that one. I am a reluctant bystander of these chair wars.

No matter how much I pet and cajole the cat, he seems to frown and try to pre-empt husband from sitting down. Yet anytime my husband gets up to leave the kitchen cat follows him right away like a happy loyal puppy. Then cat accelerates at top speed, and pounce! Cat jumps right into hubby's office chair.

"Ugh! He's following me!"
"Hun, Greezoo LOVES you.." I drawl in a syrupy save-my-marriage voice.
"But I don't feel the love. I feel attacked. I know why. The cat is a boy cat. He feels annoyed that there is a new man in your life. "
"Oh, Hun, just give it time. Mr. Greezoo will adjust."
"And furthermore, what is Greezoo doing on the table again? We are about to eat! Scat cat!"
"But I haven't served the food yet. And it's not like the cat helps himself to my food, ugh, our food, I should now say. Unless we pour cow milk for cereal. But you use almond milk and I use soy. Trust me, if he doesn't smell cow milk, he's not interested...
"Ah, let him have some cow milk in his little dishes on the ground."
"NO! Greezoo will get diarhea..."

"Nikki, I'm at the store now, and I was just wondering, which cat food do you want me to pick up? They have an indoor type...I couldn't help thinking we don't take Greezoo out for enough walks and he's looking kinda fat..."
"Are you calling my cat fat? Finally, I've been trying to tell you for months, Please quit giving him snacks...The vet says it's urgent that he lose 2 pounds."
"Ha ha, I can't stop laughing. You are making such a big deal over 2 pounds!?!"
"Hun, for a cat 2 pounds is human 25 pounds. He's a Maine Coon. It's gonna affect his joints and increase his chances of arthritits later on. He's almost 7. He's middle-aged now. We have to be careful. He can barely climb trees now."
"Yeah...I was gonna tell you Nikki, Greezoo can barely climb the tree. And remember that time Greezoo tried to jump up from the bathtub onto the bathroom window ledge and he slipped and fell into the hot bubblebath and got furious? Oh boy!!! We don't want that to happen again. No more snacks for Mr. Cat!"

Then we sit down to play cards for the first time ever. We are going heavy at it with Go Fish! with two decks of cards, my collector's edition of Queen the rock band cards and a completely pink deck of cards. I am winning until I sense that playing with 2 decks is tiring for hubby. We have way too many cards in our hands and neither of us can amass 8 of anything. I am just about to call it quits to preserve my marriage when out of nowhere Mr. Luxurious Greezoo of overample proportions scurries up onto the table next to the fridge, then pounces up to the newly-cleaned off and bare fridge top...Scrunch-plup-konk-crash, as soon as his claws graze the fridge top his still-lagging behind body falls perilously into my husband's special black ceramic President's Choice mug. Next our new ceramic castle statue hurtles to the ground, my teacup spills all over both rare decks of cards, and there's shards everywhere. Thankfully the castle is almost completely intact!
It must be made from some type of mutating ceramic + plastic deal.

I stay completely calm. Rather I am numb. How has my cat gotten so quickly out of shape?
And just what shall I do to keep both my marriage and cat in shape? Stay tuned.

Note: My husband is actually a cat lover and happy cat Daddy. And we are very happy together.      
Catch Santhosh Christudas' sardonic "catty humour" on Trollcatcomics.com

Get #Yoga Out Of The #Yoga-Class, Please!

Love In An Elevator? Love The Stairs Instead. That's my answer to a crazy old Aerosmith rock song. Too many of us are out of shape. Few of us have opportunities to get to a #yoga-class, let alone a gym. I love taking the stairs.

Here's a true story of how I hogged the stairs and nobody minded!

I, The Daughter Of An Engineer

Are you also the daughter of an engineer? We should form an online club. I could devote an entire blog called "All The Engineers In My Life." It would be a geeky soap opera. Then of course Dad lives for opera, and was a geeky engineer. Before retirement. But back to me. What is life like being the Daughter of an Engineer?

You will never look at a building the same way again. Or a car. Or a bar of soap. Let me tell you why...

OK, So Just What Do You Think About Pink?

A Rose By Any Other Name,  Or Colour
Does it make you smile or "blush"? Are you a lover of pink, or do you think that is just for young girls? Do you have that young daughter who demands everything from her wallpaper to bedspread to toys be a too-sweet shade of pink? And then you dread a couple years later having to hawk all her stuff at ridonkulously low prices on your front lawn and still no one buys it? Oh, I miss a stuffed pink toy poodle I had as a child.

I Lost My Wedding Ring Stone And Incredibly It Was Found

True story I kid you not. I am a strong woman and there I was axing down mum's buckthorn tree by request and took a break after swinging a heavy ax. Looked down. My brand new wedding ring had popped its stone. Who knew where. Anywhere in a giant tangle of brush and stones.

My mum called me two days later, "Honey, I have good news." I thought she was calling me to announce she had quit smoking. "Floyd found your stone!" Now as happy as I was my sapphire was found, I would rather have heard she quit smoking.

People Are More Important Than Diamonds

I calmly looked with my mum's help for about five minutes, saw nothing, then decided to call the jeweler's before they closed. Because I had purchased lifetime insurance for my ring, I was doing fine. They informed to simply bring in the ring. No cost to fix. I pretty much knew they would be helpful. I learned a valuable lesson. It is just a ring, I kept telling myself. Years ago I would have been frantic and angry.

You see, a good friend of mine told me as I was getting in her car and cautious not to make a mess
 " Oh, don't worry about it.  The car's just a thing. We need to learn to love people and use things, rather than use people and love things." The husband I married is far more valuable to me than the ring.

That's pretty much the philosophy here at The Truth and Health. Hope you enjoy. Keep coming back.

If You Wanna Sleep...Go Bananas!

Good morning and may you savour delectable ripe yellow bananas for your breakie. You never have more than one a day? O.K. There are few foods I cherish more than the mighty banana. True story. I went to a job interview. Short and sweet. She asked what was my favourite fruit. Right away I said, "Banana!" She smiled and asked why. I said because bananas are cheerful because of their bright yellow colour, and they are easy to open, and a great source of energy. She hired me.

You know that famous question we asked each other as kids. If you could be an animal, what animal would you be? I'd be a snake. I'll blog why later. Stay tuned. I wanna ask you as I ask myself. If you could be a fruit, which fruit would you be? I'd proudly be a banana! Because no other fruit so resembles my power animal, the snake! I just love how a banana is shaped in a u. U! You! The other. The one we all need to relate to, to bounce ideas off, to form a marriage, a family, a team, an organization. The banana is such a powerful delicious symbol. We need the yellow warmth of the sun. We love yellow flowers. We are crazy about yellow smiley faces, yellow highlighters make us retain the studying better than any colour. Yellow is nowhere so amazingly apparent in nature than bananas except lemons. But lemon is an acquired taste. And way more maintenance. Knives, sweeteners, water, glasses, lemon juicers, cutting boards, then washing up. No, bananas rock. Hands down.

Dr. Oz extolled the mighty banana as a sleep aid without peer. Only use as needed.

1. Take the sticker off
2. Rinse the skin, cuz you'll be eating it, too. Yes. No complaining. 
3. Submerge whole banana in 2-4 cups of water in a pot, or cut in half if you use a small pot.
4. Boil
5. Let it steep at least 5 minutes
6. Drink all the tea. 
7. Eat all the banana, plus the skin.
8. Be prepared to be amazed you never did this before it tastes so good.

Go bananas and have a sunshiny day thinking how much better you will sleep tonight

How To Vibrate At A Higher Frequency

Folks, if you struggle with any unhealthy habit then you need to make some huge shifts in your life. Welcome to new concepts like thinking of energy as medicine.
 A long time loyal reader asked me, "Nikki, just how do I vibrate at a higher frequency?"

 I have pondered this question during January 2014, the coldest winter in Canada in 60 years. Drinking copious cups of boiled water with rosemary (try it, it's the new great tea). Frowning, sighing, meditating, soul-searching for how I would convey this in words. I promised my sister an essay for her birthday in January. Still blocked. Life is more than mysterious. It is downright scary sometimes. What if I give the wrong answer? Spirit helped me realize there is no wrong answer. We may feel like Hansel and Gretel walking into the woods, lured by seductive gingerbread houses, but we always find what we are looking for. The question IS the answer in gift wrap.

Stay Connected


Thanks to all of YOU from all over the world for expressing interest in my unique written ideas. Together we are empowering ourselves to see common problems from a different angle and comment and share like-minded ideas. I dedicate this post with gratitude to each one of you. You are each special and your presence in my humble simple blog is greatly appreciated.

Your views motivate me to keep writing and your interest keeps inspiring me to sustain your curiosity. Now more than ever I seek to deliver to you high-quality, powerful, life-changing ideas. Helping you and your loved ones get healthier is my first objective. This is how I may serve the world. Dear readers, I aspire to help co-create a healthier, more peaceful world.  Thank you for making my off-the-wall humour, satire and tongue-in-cheek witticisms part of your wellness journey. 
Once there was a holy man preaching to a crowd. Suddenly a heckler from the complained that the holy man was just talking feel-good mush. Abruptly the holy man yelled out at him, "Shut up you mangy son of a dog!" Enraged the heckler flew at the holy man with his fist extended. It was then the holy man smiled and said, 
"Why do you doubt the healing, soothing power of loving words when you see the power of nasty words to incite pain?"  

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